Surviving the Family Feud Because You Follow Torah: 5 Tips to Help You Cope

Yeshua told us His truth and Word would divide families, but it has never been more true when we start following Torah.  Being in the Messianic family for 15 years, almost everyone I have spoken to has had a falling out with family or friends due to us wanting a deeper relationship with Yeshua.  You would expect those who love you to be excited for these new found truths, and you eagerly share them, thinking they must want to know too.  You are sadly mistaken.  Some quietly respect your decision and others may exclude you from family affairs.  Friends start becoming unavailable and eventually disappear all together.  I remember feeling hurt and saddened over the loss.  You are not alone.  You are loved dear sister, we have a beautiful hope and peace through Yeshua.  Let's immerse ourselves in His promises to make it through these difficult times.
These are 5 tips that have helped me in my journey and I pray that they are a balm for your heart.

1. Be in prayer.
 Pray for those who persecute you.  Pray for a softening of their hearts to respect your choices and for them to be open to listening.  Pray for God to give you the words to say that will be effective and not cause strife.  Pray for yourself.   Pray for the Ruach to fill you with peace, love, patience and a joy that flows out of you and touches the lives around you.

2. Include them.
 In defense, we want to pull away and cut them off.  Some relationships that may be damaging to your family, may call for severing. But in most cases, we need to continue to reach out. They are afraid of what they do not know, and will pull away.   This is where we can show them the love of Yeshua, through our actions and not our words.  Invite them to Passover Seder dinners and other functions at your church. Make sure you are having regular dinners , birthdays, 4th of July, and attending soccer games that involves your family.  Talk freely of your last Sabbath sermon you heard last week and share your plans for the upcoming Sukkot Camping you are attending.  You may get some blank stares and nods, but you are slowing informing them so they get more comfortable with your new life changes.

3. Love them.
Friendships may pass along the wayside, but try to end on a loving note.  I have realized certain friendships were meant for a season in my life, for which I will always be thankful.  God, in His faithfulness, has given me friendships 100 fold in my journey to ease the pain of the ones lost.  But, family is here to stay.  Love them through this transition.  It maybe a month or even years.  Call and tell them you love them.  Send them a thoughtful text or card. Give and love freely!

4.Forgive.
I know of instances where harsh words were exchanged, resentment, and slander has occurred and this can cause great divides. Hurt and pain on both sides. Forgive them.  As followers of Yeshua, we do not have a choice.  That is no way to begin our path following Torah, if we have unforgiveness in our heart.

5.  Be Ready.
Be ready with answers to why you do what you do.  If you are following the above steps: Praying, Including them in your life, showing love and forgiveness...eventually, they will ask.  Be Ready!  Have a simple answer and scripture, just in case they want to open their Bible.   Say everything in love.  We want to provoke them to jealousy, so they desire a deeper relationship with Yeshua.

Help! It's Sukkot and I'm In Charge of the Kids!! 5 Tips to Get You Started

Sukkot is one of my favorite times of the year.  Our community does a family camp and it's a great time of fellowship.  Nothing brings a community together like no make-up, sweatshirts everyday and lack of showers.  But when we get together, we are swimming in children.  There are about 50 children that we adults have to keep an eye on throughout the day.  Mostly, they are playing games, boating or hiking.  But it is nice to have a time for all to come together in the afternoon to do a craft  and devotional with the kids. So, if your community has either one day or several days together during Sukkot, these tips will help keep you organized.

1. Color-Code the kids. This will help keep the kids together as color groups and minimize the group sizes(10 kids per group). I like to mix ages, so if there are older kids in the group, they can assist the younger. Use either colored name tag lanyards or colored rubber bracelets. Have them return them in a coordinating colored basket at the end of your time.

2. Rotate to different stations in one day(5+ hr, 5 stations) or 1 hour and 15 min. per day for 5 days. Each station lasting an hour. Give each station a fun Sukkot name. Ex. Snack time= Manna Station.

3.Have a schedule:     Sing Songs
                                   Devotional Talk and memory verse
                                   Craft 
                                   Snack and activity
                                   Game.
If you do each thing for 15 minutes and then rotate to the next station, you will have done about 1 hour and 15 minutes. Add more stations if you'd like!

4. Ideas, Ideas and more Ideas!!  There really is a wealth of knowledge out there to help you plan.  Making a sukkot out of a refrigerator box.  We did this when my kids were little. Make edible sukkah's.  Graham cracker walls and pretzel rooftop..yummy!!  For your devotional, talk about the Israelites traveling through the dessert and having to pack up their temporary dwellings and move. Have the kids pick up their selves, tables, chairs and "travel" .  Be creative and just be organized. The kids will have a ton of fun.

5. Get volunteers.  Don't do this all yourself.  Look for like minded people who want to invest in the children and genuinely want to help them grow in Yeshua. You will need 5 adults, one per station.  Depending on the number of kids, 2 adults per group and some teens are great!

Happy Sukkot!!

ABC's of Shabbat

When I first started keeping Shabbat, I didn't have the best attitude.  If I had a list like this to help me transition out of a self-centered Saturday to a holy, Christ -centered Shabbat, it wouldn't have taken me so long to appreciate how beautiful and set-apart this day can truly become.  May your Shabbats be richly blessed!

Acts of Love-Above all days, lets speak and have actions of love
Bike ride- A leisurely ride and praying as you go.
Create and decorate a Bible/Prayer journal
Design a Bible Study just for you
Erev Shabbat Meal-light some candles and pray and eat together as a family.  My daughter likes to set the table extra special for Shabbat meal.
Feed the Duck or birds.  This is relaxing thing to do if you have littles.  Letting them appreciate God's creation.
Gather with believers.  We are commanded to fellowship with like minded believers.  This can be a lonely path, and we need to sharpen each other weekly.
Hospitality-Open your home to others to share a simple meal and encourage fellowship
Inspect your Heart- It is important to have a weekly check up to remove any bitterness, anger or unresolved issues to truly have a healing Shabbat.
Jigsaw puzzle- If you can truly relax(I can't) doing a 10,000 piece puzzles, it's a nice activity during those long peaceful summer Shabbats.
Knit a gift- One Shabbat I was home with my sick toddler and was able to knit a baby hat for my niece.
Listen to Worship or a favorite sermon or teaching.  This creates such a wonderful atmosphere to welcome in Shabbat.
Make a card --Snail mail is dying art.  Especially something hand made.  Add a verse and encouragement. If you are feeling creative, this will truly bless someone.  If you just write a card, it will equally bless the receiver.
Nature Walk- I love doing this with my family.  Peaceful family walk. Surrounded by God's beautiful handiwork.
Organize a prayer group- This a great way to welcome in Shabbat for Erev Shabbat or for the end of Shabbat as a Havdalah.
Pray-If a group setting is not your thing, then get in that prayer closet
Quiz your family on Bible Trivia- We like doing this on Friday Nights in the winter when Shabbat begins at 4pm.
Read the Word- This needs to be one of the first things we do
Sing Praises-This is a wonderful runner up
Talk with your spouse, kids, --I like to take this time to have one on one devotions with each of my girls and take the time to see how they are doing.
Unplug-In this day and age, this is an important thing to do.  We are so tied to our electronics, we need to cut the cord on Shabbat and focus on Him.
Visit the sick, homebound, new mother.  This a wonderful time to visit someone who is unable to attend services or needs to see Yeshua in you by giving your time to care.
Write in your prayer/Bible journal- This past 6 months I have incorporated a Bible Journal where I write the verses that minister to me during my devotions and I love it.  Decorating it is fun too!
Xamine your attitude- Shabbat is made for us. If you want to truly be blessed by it, your attitude may need to be adjusted.
Yeshua is the center of the day.  We keep Shabbat because we love Him. May all we do, point to Him on Shabbat and bring honor and glory to Him.
Zzzzzzzzzz.....Rest, nap...we worked 6 days and now it's time to rest. 

“Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy."  Exodus 20:8

I Want A Marshmallow!

Eating Biblically clean can be a challenge to be sure, even as an adult. Certainly more so if you have children.  The kind neighbor who wants to give your children a gelatin filled fruit snack.  Grandma wants to have the kids over for smore's around the campfire. When my kids see the masses of kids running towards those rice krispie snacks the soccer mom bought for all the kids after their game, they get a totally bummed look in their eyes.   Don't get me started on birthday parties with their gummy bears and pepperoni pizza!  It's a fine line of being assertive but not rude.  I want my kids to learn to graciously decline these treats without offending or appearing haughty. I want them to navigate these waters of unclean foods on their own, so they are confident in these Godly choices that are meant to guide and protect us.  Here are some ideas that I have learned to graciously decline the pork-product treat, and to kindly offer a substitution or alternative.


1.  Manners.  Saying, "No, Thank You", goes a long way.  Smile and move on. No need to go to chapter and verse go, unless they ask.  State your responses, firmly, but kindly. I want it to be my kids that speak up, not me.  I want them to want to please the Lord and follow His commandments.  That in turn pleases me the most.

2.Make it yourself.  Make your own dish to pass. Make your own marshmallows.  Bring Turkey pepperoni. Bring Beef hot dogs.  Bring non-gelatin fruit snacks. There are so many other alternatives. Keep it simple.  I am sure there will be a veggie tray, so load up those carrots and celery and enjoy your family.

3. Be Clear!  With allergies running rampant these days, most events will ask if your child has allergies.  I state that we don't eat pork, and I give example of gelatin and pork by products.  That way, we rank with the peanut allegry kid and nobody bats an eye.

As you dodge that pork chop at the next function, always remember to come to all events in the love of Yeshua.  We want to provoke people to jealousy, not provoke them.  We want them to see our genuine relationship with the Lord, our devotion to God's word and the love of Yeshua's sacrifice for them, for us.  Remember, why we do what we do.  Out of love for our Messiah.

Halloween Alternative.........

There are so many Christians out there wanting a Halloween alternative for their kids...a church harvest festival, a fluffy and cutesy costume party, or just stay home and hand out candy! A lot of us have been there.  I certainly was growing up. But I also didn't know what it was really about, and now knowing what I know, I have decided to not participate. I'd like to share the best alternative....there is no alternative!
There is no place for believers to participate in a holiday dedicated to Satan and his followers.  You can attach the name of Jesus on it, dress up as Moses and celebrate within your church doors, but you are celebrating a demonic holiday. Black and white.  We are called to be separate from the world, and not look like it in any way, shape or form.  Satan must be giddy to have believers participating in his favorite holiday. 
Most say, "It's for the kids."  or "It's night of harmless games and treats.".  "It's not a Halloween Party, it's a Harvest Party(but come dressed up in a fun costume, there will be a contest later)
Halloween is not Snoopy, princesses or SpongeBob Square Pants....that is the cover. Satan likes to make things look pretty and fun...to cover up the truth. 
Dressing up on this holiday, handing out candy,  trick or treating, and celebrating is a pagan ritual.  Trying to evade demons. It's history is horrifying. You may have your own reasons or justification, but I urge you to dig deep into the origins and push aside the mini-snickers bar and take the mask from your eyes and see it for what it really is.  Evil. 

Genesis 2:17

but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die.”

 

My hubby recently did a sermon on the two trees in the garden.  Tree of Life, and the Tree of the knowledge of good and evil.  We are presented with options, who we will obey and follow.  God said not to partake of the tree knowledge of good and evil.  I am sure that tree had some yummy looking fruit on it, looked harmless enough...but the truth is...God said NO!  Too many Christians today are partaking of the fruit of that forbidden tree.  An evil we were never supposed to be exposed to..a choice that causes death.

Let's stop trying to justify evil deeds.

3 John 1:11

Beloved, do not imitate what is evil, but what is good. He who does good is of God, but he who does evil has not seen God.

This has been on my heart.  God is calling you to draw close to Him, which means leaving the things of the world behind, because those things separate us from Him. 
   
Romans 12:2
And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.

I don't want to come across judgemental  or harsh.  I wasn't even planning on publishing this, it was my own personal "writing rant".  But it happened.  
God has to reveal this to your heart.  You have to be the one to WANT to know where this holiday comes from and where it leads.   Take the time to discover the Truth for yourself.

Pregnancy Photoshoot!!

I was a little nervous on having a photoshoot of my BIG belly on pregnancy #4.  Face it, the belly doesn't get prettier the more pregnancies you have and I am certainly the heaviest I have ever been !  But, my friend talked me into it and with her editing skills, I am very glad I did it.  Don't miss out on getting priceless pics of your preggo belly over hang-ups on our flaws(or what we THINK are flaws).  Let me share my wonderful experience :)

Thank You, Heather Dorney Photography for preserving my precious memories of my precious little one!

https://www.facebook.com/#!/pages/Heather-Dorney-Photography/200842693301307

{SIC} to SIL!

My sweet friend came home last week with a great big beautiful ring on her finger....and she's engaged to my brother-in-law!  I could not be more stoked :)  Her and her family have been involved in our church from the beginning. We have always felt like family and now it is to be.  So now my Sister In Christ is now my Sister-In-Law(SIC-SIL)!  I am so blessed to have her apart of the family.  We have bonded many a nights over cupcake shows, ice-cream and taquitoes. I am excited for many years of more bonding moments to come!  I love you sweet friend!

Jessie and Nate--what a sweet couple they make!

Now I am complete! I could not be more blessed with some amazing sisters(in-law).  My girls could not have better Aunties apart of their lives.  Bethy and Jessie, I love you ladies!