I have 4 daughters, and to be honest I have thought about this for them. I pray my girls all have Torah observant husbands someday, and that they don't grow to be discouraged as they wait on the Lord. I see a frustration among our young, amazing Torah keeping ladies who have grown up in this movement. Many are in small communities, even home groups, where the selection of a possible spouse is not ideal. You are waiting and longing to run a home of your own, raise a family and desire a equally yoked spouse to love. But where is he???? Does God really know the desires of your heart? You've quoted that verse to yourself almost daily. You are thinking..."What more can I do?" Should I go travel and find that man that got has for me? Online Torah dating sites? Hop from community to community, praying he is there!? Go to Israel and get him right from the Holy Land? My dear, sweet young lady who is waiting for her Torah observant prince charming. Here are 3 steps to help you in your time of waiting, even though they may not be what you want to hear.
1. Serve and Minister to others. This is such a great time to serve those who need help. Focus on serving the Lord and others while you wait. Being a single woman, your time is valuable and precious, use it for the Lord. Your community needs ladies like you to be active in meal trains, baby/wedding showers, nursery, teaching, singing, kitchen duty or a mother's assistant. There is always a need. This serves many purposes. You are serving and ministering, you are taking the focus off yourself, you are not idle and you are building character of which will be needed if God places a husband in your life.
2. Seek the Lord, not a husband. I love the saying, "A woman's heart should be so lost in God, that a man must seek Him in order to find her." Ladies, don't settle for anything less than a man after God's own heart. He must seek the Lord, and then he will find YOU! You do not need to go on husband hunting trip around the country. God is quite capable of bringing him to you when He deems you both ready and capable of marriage. You need to make sure you are ready spiritually, so when the time comes, you will not have regrets or delays. There are temptations all around you. Satan is trying to steal your purity and give you a feeling of incompleteness and unsettled spirit. That is not of God. Pray, pray, pray. Be on your knees in prayer to make you complete in the Lord. Remember, the best gift you can give to your future husband, is to be able to tell him that you saved yourself for him. Your purity of thoughts, actions and body are ready to be given to the one God has planned you.
3. Helpmate skills. I know my husband could have benefited from me taking a cooking class or two. If you can't boil an egg or sew a button on a shirt, then use this time of waiting to better yourself. Compile a list of things you want to learn and start researching the best way to achieve this skill. Some ideas would be: sewing, cooking(gotta know how to make Challah!), teaching, knitting, making natural products(soap, toothpaste, deodorant, candles, ect), personal finance, farming, gardening, learning Hebrew or, organizational skills. Look into reading blogs, books, learning from a mentor, a college class, or a class at church.
You may say, " I am doing all those things, now what?"
Continue to wait. Don't rush God's timing. Don't take things into your own hands, if God is not directing you. If you want God's best, then let Him guide your path. Surround yourself with like-minded girlfriends. Encourage each other and keep each other accountable in God's Word. Be content where you are and with Him. Yes, God said He will give us the desires of our heart, but make sure your desires are lining up with His. Is it His desire that you marry right now..or dare I say, at all? Pray for His desire to fill your heart and to give you peace about it. He will either grow that desire to marry or He will replace it with what He has called you to do. Make sure you are open to receiving what He has in store for you. Ladies, you are so precious and I want you to be full of love, joy and peace. Yes, marriage is a wonderful and amazing commitment, but your journey with the Lord is where true love lies.
